I'm a single woman, and I'm really trying very hard to come to terms with that as a state of being. I've been struggling for years to accept that I'm not the girl men fall in love with. I'm the one they go to for help, support, and a sympathetic ear (and sex, that too) when things are going badly for them.
My brain has been able to come to terms with that, but my body isn't getting the memo. I've had enough of living in a state of perpetual sexual frustration. Getting laid once or twice a year (whenever I could trick myself into thinking that I might have found an actual relationship) was just not enough. Something has got to give
I get a lot of offers from men in open relationships, I don't know why exactly, but they all seem really anxious to sleep with me. I've always turned them down because, well, my pride doesn't do well with the idea of being the piece on the side. But like I said, this frustration was starting to cause problems with my concentration, my work, every other aspect of my life. So, when an ex of mine who is in an open relationship currently called me up and asked me out to dinner, I said sure. We had a nice evening, and it ended up in bed which is what we both had sort of expected. It was no good. I think I faked it enough not to hurt his pride, but still, I got nothing out of it, might as well have been a handshake.
I've had that experience when I've tried "casual" sex before. It just wasn't very good at all, but I assumed that it was a sexual chemistry thing. Either him, or me, or the combination of the two. But this time he was a known quantity, the sex was spectacular when we were together before.
So what gives? Am I just wired to not enjoy casual sex? Is there anything I can do about this?
Because the current state of affairs sucks and I don't know if I can handle it.
My brain has been able to come to terms with that, but my body isn't getting the memo. I've had enough of living in a state of perpetual sexual frustration. Getting laid once or twice a year (whenever I could trick myself into thinking that I might have found an actual relationship) was just not enough. Something has got to give
I get a lot of offers from men in open relationships, I don't know why exactly, but they all seem really anxious to sleep with me. I've always turned them down because, well, my pride doesn't do well with the idea of being the piece on the side. But like I said, this frustration was starting to cause problems with my concentration, my work, every other aspect of my life. So, when an ex of mine who is in an open relationship currently called me up and asked me out to dinner, I said sure. We had a nice evening, and it ended up in bed which is what we both had sort of expected. It was no good. I think I faked it enough not to hurt his pride, but still, I got nothing out of it, might as well have been a handshake.
I've had that experience when I've tried "casual" sex before. It just wasn't very good at all, but I assumed that it was a sexual chemistry thing. Either him, or me, or the combination of the two. But this time he was a known quantity, the sex was spectacular when we were together before.
So what gives? Am I just wired to not enjoy casual sex? Is there anything I can do about this?
Because the current state of affairs sucks and I don't know if I can handle it.
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